by the H. Sisters
from Virtuous Daughters, January 2009~Volume 8, Number 1
Four Sisters Share their Thoughts about how Siblings can Truly be Best Friends...
One thing that is very helpful to me in considering sibling relationships is to think of putting myself in my siblings’ “shoes.” For instance: if a sister asks to borrow a shirt, I try to think if I were in their position, how would I like my sister to treat me?
I’d like to encourage you to invest in your relationship with your siblings. Your siblings will pretty much always be in your life! Friends will come and go as you move through different stages of your life. But your siblings will still be in your life, at family reunions, weddings, etc. You may be thinking, “But you don’t know my siblings.” And you’re probably right, but God specially chose your family to be together and He knows what He is doing! Make the most of it. If you make your siblings your friends instead of foes, you can have so much more fun together. Believe me, I know! My siblings really are my best friends.
In thinking about what I should share with you, it was hard to pick just one thing. There are so many facets of sibling relationships. There are many people who have prayed and wished for a sibling. What a blessing siblings are.
Perhaps you have one sibling that you really “rub” wrong with. Let me encourage you to pray for this sibling. There is something special about praying for a sibling that you don’t get along with. God has a unique way of pointing you to Himself and maybe even showing you some things that you could work on to improve that relationship. You may have heard the saying “Kill with kindness.” I would say, look for ways to serve your siblings! This may sound very unattractive to you. But the Bible says, “If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.”—Proverbs 25:21-22
It’s amazing to see how well this really works! I’ve tried it! It is even kind of fun! Think of little things like making their bed, helping them do their chores, or making their favorite dessert. Your siblings are worth it! If you invest in them now you will only grow stronger in character and hopefully you will strengthen that relationship learning to work around the “rubs.” In years to come you will probably look back and even laugh at the faint or far gone memories of your disagreements of the past.
With my sisters practicing all of the above wisdom they’ve shared here, I’ve had absolutely no trouble getting along with them . . . ever! :) Unfortunately, getting along with your brothers and sisters can be hard work sometimes. We are called to sharpen, encourage and bless one another and honestly, that isn’t easy. Why is this hard work? We as humans are a selfish and proud lot! “Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom.”—Proverbs 13:10 Ask the Lord to help you. He is faithful and continually helps me!
If you don’t know Him as your Savior today, that is the first issue to get straightened out. Romans 10:13 “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” Luke 14:11 “For whosoever exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.”
Invest in your siblings. You’ll not regret it!
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