by Sarah & Hannah H.
from Virtuous Daughters, October 2003~Volume 3, Number 7
Our sibling relationships should be some of our best. If you think about it, it should be like having your friends with you all day. This time right now is so very important because you’re laying the foundation for your relationships for life. When and if you’re married, you will not have the same time to work on these relationships. God gave each sibling to us to accomplish a special purpose in our lives. We need to learn to love and appreciate each one as they are.
Many times the reason for arguing, friction, conflict, etc. is two-way. It’s so easy to blame the other person involved, but many times the problem lies in us! I heard someone recently say, “The reason there is a breakdown in any relationship is because someone, somewhere did not communicate value to another.” Think about this. It is so very true. Ask God to show you how you’re not communicating value to your siblings. There are many ways we can communicate value. What are some?
Words of Affirmation: Little ones especially love just for you to stop and talk to them for a few minutes. Bigger ones find that encouraging words or notes are all they need to spur them on.
Quality Time: Just a few moments with your siblings are all it may take. Go on a picnic, make cookies, or even help them on their work. The importance of this one is just being together.
Gifts: This doesn’t have to mean give huge gifts ALL the time! Little gifts show appreciation well too. It’s the thought that counts. Make a bookmark, give things you’ve outgrown or that you don’t use (don’t look at this as your “trash can”; use discretion), or give anything else you can think of.
Physical Touch: Sometimes a hug around the neck may be best. Pats on the back are great signs of affirmation (to brothers especially :)).
Acts of Service: Load the dishwasher, make their bed, help out in their school. These can especially mean so much when ones are having rough days!
Let us challenge you to pick out one sibling this next week that you want to specifically strengthen your relationship with. A good sibling to choose may be the one that you seem to always argue with. God loves unity in a home and when we’re striving to strengthen our relationship by showing them our love, this pleases God.
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