Making Your Brother Your Best Friend*
by Tiffany S.
from Virtuous Daughters, January 2005~Volume 4, Number 10
"Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious ointment upon the head, that ran down upon the beard… that went down to the skirts of his garments; As the dew of Hermon, and as the dew that descended upon the mountains of Zion: for there the LORD commanded the blessing, even life evermore.”-Psalm 133
One of the biggest keys to making your brothers your best friends is to love them. Being the oldest of five children, I often “set the mood," and it can be difficult at times to show love and patience. I can say with confidence, however, that my three wonderful brothers are among my best friends. We enjoy being together and like to do fun things. With each brother, our friendship is special in its own unique way. For example, Justin and I are more prone to sit and chat, while Gideon prefers to show me his farm he set up in the playroom, and Ethan wants me to read him a book. I cherish each of my brothers and thank God for them.
It is sad to me when I hear girls speak negatively of their brothers. Their complaints and selfish words bring grief to my heart. Why do they fail to see the beautiful friendship with their brothers that is so near them at this time in their life? God’s Word tells us that it so wonderful when brothers and sisters get along and become close friends! Proverbs 17:17 “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” While outside friends are wonderful and indeed provide doses of encouragement and love, a brother is simply different. I have found my brother, Justin, one of my most encouraging and loving friends! Often when I am discouraged, he will encourage me and cheer me up in sweet ways.
So how do you make your brother your best friend? As I said earlier, the key is taking the focus off of what your brother can do for you, but what you can do for your brother. Several years ago I struggled with this very principle. I was expecting one of my siblings to treat me a certain way, yet God taught me that I needed to shift my focus and learn to love my siblings. I needed to find out what I could do for them. This brought me closer to my siblings and really strengthened our relationship. I began to delight in doing kind things for them, and it was a real joy!
I would like to give some pointers on the brother-sister relationship that I have learned from the Scriptures. They are very practical, yet have really helped improve and strengthen my relationships with my brothers.
Sisters, it is my earnest prayer that your relationship with your brother is not a weak one, but a strong one. Can your brother lean on you when he is down and be confident in your wise counsel and sincere love? Is your brother among your best friends? If not, begin now to form that friendship with him, because it is one of the most beautiful and blessed friendships that God will ever give you!
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